Kamala Harris still, as of this writing, has not taken any unscripted questions from the press since she was anointed as the Democrats’ presidential candidate. Next week is the Democrat convention which opens on August 19, during which she and Tim “Blue Falcon” Walz will be formally nominated – and it’s a safe bet that she won’t be answering any questions during that event, either – but stay tuned, because there will be plenty of news coming out of that show, that’s for sure and for certain.
Some in the press – even in the legacy media – are beginning to get a little impatient with the vice president’s reticence. One of those legacy media outlets is NBC’s Politics desk, which on Friday presented a list of questions that they think the Veep should be answering. Well, she won’t be answering them – so let me guess what her answers would be, were she to answer them (yes, I know) honestly.
So, with tongue firmly planted in cheek: Let’s have a look.
Would her presidency be a continuation of President Joe Biden’s policies and programs?
Kamala Harris: “No, of course not. My presidency will be much more socialistic than Joe’s. I will place every government control I can on every aspect of the American people’s lives. If I think I can get away with banning semi-auto rifles with an executive order, I’ll do it, round the guns up, throw a lot of people in jail, and hang the consequences; by the time the Supreme Court can rule, it will all be over. I’ll be appointing, oh, ten or twelve hardcore progressives as new justices anyway.”
Where does she disagree with Biden?
KH: “Joe was way too warm and fuzzy. He’s soft, and I don’t just mean between his ears. You can’t make an omelet without breaking some eggs, and I’m going to jump right in and start smashing shells. It’s for the American people’s own good.”
Where do her allegiances lie in the Democrats’ progressive-vs.-establishment fight?
KH: “You’re kidding, right?”
What would be her top priority if Democrats win full control of Congress?
KH: “That’s easy. Abolish the filibuster, stack the Supreme Court – as I said, I plan to appoint ten or twelve new justices, and I’ll make sure they do what I tell them. I’ll get the NRA and all the other Second Amendment groups listed as terrorist organizations. With a bit of luck, we can get federal legislation banning voter ID requirements and mandating mail-in voting. We got a one-party supermajority in California, so there’s no reason we can’t do it on the national level.”
Where would she compromise with Republicans?
KH: “Compromise? What’s that? They won’t be around much longer as a political party anyway, except for the few tame ones that we keep around to make it look like there is still some opposition.”
How would she wield power?
KH: “For your own good. Remember what I said about omelets? Well, sometimes you just have to put a boot on people’s necks. It’s for their own good, after all, and if people in places like Kansas, Wyoming, Texas, and all those other red states can’t learn that, well, we’ll just have to re-educate them. I’ve already spoken with Secretary of State Hillary Clinton about setting up and running the re-education camps, although we won’t call them that. We’ll call them Happy Fun Camps, and if you media people know what’s good for you, you won’t look too hard at what goes on in them.”
And how does she handle defeat and victory? (Unlike past modern presidential nominees, she’s never won a presidential primary or caucus.)
KH: “I’ve been defeated, and I don’t like it, not one bit. I’ll never forget that #(*$E@# Tulsi Gabbard for what she did to me in the primary debate in 2019, and if she thinks being put on the Clear Skies list was a pain in the neck, she ain’t seen nothing yet. I don’t expect that, once elected, I’ll have to worry about defeat ever again.”
See Related: WaPo Busts Kamala in Glorious Op-Ed Linking ‘Communist’ and Her Proposed ‘Price Controls’
The Choice in November Is Clear: Do We Want to Grow the Size of the Economy or the Size of the State?
Now, this is satire. But the broad strokes? Kamala Harris and Tim Walz are by leaps and bounds the most leftist pols to ever seek the offices of president and vice president. While my proposed replies are, as I said, tongue-in-cheek, they are of the right order of magnitude. I suspect – were we to look into the deep, dark recesses of Kamala Harris’s mind (a truly horrifying thought), I’d be willing to bet that my answers are pretty close. Not to what she might say, mind you – but what she thinks. (And I use the term “thinks” in the broadest possible sense.)
And, once again, this woman can never be trusted anywhere near the levers of power.
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